<UPDATE>This post is updated with a comment from R. Podarok</UPDATE>
I recently decided to join a gym. Now-a-days they call them health clubs and I'm probably always going to call them "gyms". I went to a WorldGym years ago and decided it was time to go again.
I received an USPO mail solicitation to the local Gold's Gym. The advertised rate seemed reasonable because all I wanted to do was about ten minutes of floor exercises, warm up on an elliptical trainer, lift some weights, cool down on an elliptical, take a shower and go. In and out in a lunch hour or so, three to four times a week. Maybe use the sauna.
Simple, yes? No classes, no pilates, no yoga, no aerobics, no babysitting. Just do my routine, in and out and that's it.
So I went to Gold's with the USPO solicitation in hand. I asked at the desk, "Are there any other fees involved?" and was told I'd need to talk to a member something or other ("membership coordinator" sounds right. Nice title, that).
"All I want to know is if there's other fees involved."
"Let me get a membership coordinator to help you."
Fine. I had a few minutes. Don't remember the name of the fellow who sat down with me. He asked my name.
"Before we get there, I came because of this." I showed him the flyer. I think the actual price was US$24.99/month. "I want to know if there's other fees involved."
"Could you fill out this form for me?"
"I'm wanting to save us both lots of time here. Just tell me if there are other fees involved."
A couple of back and forths later, "There's an enrollment fee, ..." and a this fee and a that fee.
"Thanks. That's all I needed to know." I walked out. It had some to do with the fees, more to do with not being able to get a straight answer. I threw the USPO solicitation in the trash as I walked out.
They sent another in the mail a week later. It also got trashed. I opened the phone book and started calling gyms top to bottom.
"What's the least expensive program you offer?"
I saw a TV ad for WorkOutWorld around this point in time. "US$10/month for life" Okay. I went down to the local WorkOutWorld. "Are there any other fees involved?"
A yearly membership fee, paid on 15 April of each year, about US$40.
Anything else?
"No, that's it."
Could I pay in cash? (I mean, US$10/month. That's spare change these days)
"Yes."
So after about a week of going to WorkOutWorld I got a letter indicating that I would have to pay US$15/month because I elected to pay by cash. This was clearly written in little tiny print (about 6pt (my guess)) on the back of the contract (the whole contract, actually, was in little tiny print). Right next to "Please read the contract carefully".
And as I said to the woman on the phone, "How come when I asked what the monthly fee was, I was told US$10 and that I could pay in cash?"
I was told that both statements were true, they just weren't true together. I could pay in cash and I could pay US$10/month.
I explained that this wasn't true. I could pay in cash OR I could pay US$10/month.
My next stop was BestFitness. They advertised a US$19.99/month fee. I called. First call got Scott.
"I'm calling about your US$19.99/month rate. Are there any other fees involved?"
He asked my name. I told him, "Joseph".
"Well, Joe, if you can come in we can go over our options with you."
Lesson the first: When someone tells you their name, don't change it to show familiarity without asking first. All you've done is demonstrate false familiarity. And possibly disrespect.
"Just tell me if there are any other fees involved."
"If you can come in we can go over our options with you. I'm here -- "
"No, I'm not going to come in until I know what the least expensive membership program is. I don't want classes, I don't want training, I don't want tanning, I just want to come in, lift, leave. That's it. What's your least expensive membership program."
"That depends on whether or not you'll be taking classes, doing tanning, you really need to come in so we can go over our options -- "
"Oh, Scott...you've lost the sale." I hung up. I had just told him I only wanted to come in, lift and leave, didn't want classes or anything else and he starts selling me classes. Also, stating my goals going in as "come in, lift, leave" should be a clue that I don't like to waste time on things.
Remember I mentioned I'd gone to WorldGym years back? BestFitness took over WorldGym (at least in Nashua), so remembering that I did like WorldGym I called again a few days later and got a Karen. After a few back and forths she told me that yes, the basic membership plan was US$19.99/month and if I enrolled this month there was a special so I wouldn't need to pay any enrollment or other fees. She told me when she was in and entered me in a guest book.
I went down to the local BestFitness. I got there half an hour before Karen got in. "Mind if I walk around?"
The receptionist told me she'd have someone show me around.
"No need to trouble anyone."
"Let me get Sean or Scott to show you around."
Scott? Scott??? "I'll take Sean, please."
Scott showed up.
"I asked for Sean."
Sean came over. We walked to the gym floor. "You talked with Karen?"
Yes. She told me US$19.99/month and that there was a special going on right now, no enrollment or any other fees.
"I don't know about that. The only special we have now is ..." (I don't remember what it was. It wasn't the special Karen mentioned, that I remember) "...and the US$19.99/month is if you get a friend to enroll."
I stopped walking. "So what's the monthly fee if I don't get someone else to enroll?"
US$24.99/month.
"Karen never told me that. I asked what the least expensive program was and she told me US$19.99/month."
I was told that was the truth, the least expensive program was only US$19.99/month. I just needed a friend to enroll in order to get it.
"Karen never told me that I needed a friend to enroll in order to get it."
I turned around and started walking out.
"It's only five dollars more a month, Joe," Sean said.
"Good. Then you pay it."
Bait&Switch
The above are (to me) examples of "The Old Bait&Switch". Tell the customer one thing to get them in the door then tell them something else once they're in the door in the hope that once there, they'll just go along.
I have never liked "The Old Bait&Switch". I find it...well, I find it distasteful (anybody read It All Started With That First Bite Of Food?) if not downright dishonest. I don't care what the contract says in the fine print (6pt. Come on!). There should be no fine print, especially when you have an interested buyer who clearly states their objectives. Get them in the door, give them what they want, meet their expectations and they will upsell themselves.
Doesn't matter the product or service, that's the way it goes.
The NextStage EULA
The above were strong lessons to me because NextStage is crafting its EULA (End User License Agreement) for it's online tools. I want to meet consumers' expectations, not give them frustration and definitely not alienate them. I'm emphasizing something simple, something like
- You get this and only this.
- We're responsible for our system, not yours.
- Live Long and Prosper.
My concept of EULAs goes back to Philippe Kahn's Borland Software and their "No Nonsense EULA".
It was simple, clean and neat. At least that's how I remember it.
But that was long before I ever went to a gym.
(and to close the loop on that one...) I'm joining the local YMCA. They are more than US$19.99/month, more than US$24.99/month.
However, they do clearly advertise their rates on their website. All their fees. Monthly dues, enrollment, membership.
Clean, neat, simple.
I'm big into that these days.
Comment from R. Podarok - I think what they did to you was unfair and poor customer service.
Thanks. I agree. I'm posting a follow up today. You can find it at The High Cost of Cancelling WorkOutWorld Membership.
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